The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

When I started writing my own eulogy the other day, I quickly ran into a problem: I don't really know what to say. The second chapter and its respective habit had me stumped; I didn't know how I wanted my life to end yet when the beginning was so bittersweet. I admitted to my good friend Tim Malone that if this were all I was to get in, just shy of 24 years, then it would alright with me. For nearly 24, I have done pretty damn good, I think.

Epiphanies are few and far between in life, and perhaps that's why they are so precious. Sometimes literature, even when it's on the Self-Help shelf, can hold pages of printed paradigm-shifting revelations. As I read this book, I felt a bit like someone caught in a lethal quicksand trap while in the midst of a juicy novel: I couldn't turn the pages fast enough as the sand was giving out beneath my very feet. 

And yet there was this eulogy of mine. How did I want my life to end? What would people say? Where would I be by then? How many children would I be Godfather to(see below post, there's still time to sign up)? 

The author, Stephen Covey, reasoned that if one could determine how they wanted life to end, then they could start down that path. You need to see the light at the end of the tunnel before you walk to it. Once you had the ending down, the Mission Statement was the first building block to be laid, the first guiding candle to be lit. 

Sure, the 24-year run has been good, and I hope it goes on for many more. But Covey made me think twice about the life I've led when he wrote about what he calls "alternative centers" for one's life. The Mission Statement, your core values and beliefs you discover through exercises like imagining your own funeral, should ideally be the center of your life and the guiding light. But all too often we choose false centers for our lives: family, spouse, friends, money, possessions, self, work, etc. 

You'll have to actually read the book to learn more, but as I delved into chapter 2, it became apparent I've not been making life decisions based on what I value and believe in. For the majority of my life, I've been changing those centers, which made sense when I matched the roller coaster my life feels like to the 7 Habits. Does life feel like a rollercoaster for you? 

Do you ever feel like your not in control? Like you don't have any say over what happens to you? 

I did. Enough. I want to be in control. I want to determine the course of my life, not someone else, not the people around me or my job. I should decide where I want to go and what I want to do. 

If you don't already have a copy, find one in your local library or bookstore. This book is the most worthwhile thing I've done in years.